Modern Day Relationship : How it starts and How should it ACTUALLY start[ Part-5]
Abhi always has been a guy who can’t stick to one thing in life and he always feel the change is the order of life and everything around him should have a sense of newness and spark in it. He started getting the feeling that it was his mistake that he jumped into the conclusion that Shagun is worth his gf and he should have left his relationship with Shagun till friendship only, not more than that. He started getting a feeling that he knew Shagun from such a long time, there was nothing new to explore about her or know her, somewhere down the line it was all routine stuff, boring being with same gal from child hood and now as gf. He talked about this in his guy’s circle and as usual came all crap ideas from people, who were already into relationship for selfish interests. They all advocated that it’s time for him to move ahead and search for sum one more spicy and hot gf than Shagun. Neither he would be able to discover any new side of Shagun nor love making with her would give him any new pleasure and moreover, she is already possessive, would make him senti and restrict him to her shell. Somewhat already irritated with Shagun’s behavior, Abhi once again got carried away with his friend’s wordings and felt yes, he needs to have some new gf, who has more charm, attitude and style…..Guys never wait and so with Abhi. He found himself running after hot gals, who threw attitude and cared damn for his liking or wordings.
At the same time, Shagun found solace in constantly trying to call him, reading his mails, sms, recollecting the golden time they spent, reflecting how she changed her priorities to make him happy and silent tears became her asset of life. She didn’t even have her past friends company, as she gave all her time to him and neglected and ignored other friends, which left her alone now, with no support of bf too. His efforts of talking with Abhi always went futile, as he never showed interest nor afforded any time out for her. She just kept on asking the common friends at times about him and his actions. Shagun started sending him all depressing messages, how much lonely she feels in life and how badly she wants him in her life. Abhi was going crazy with no “stylish” gal falling for his trap and Shagun’s actions making him more irritated. He thought of directly speaking with Shagun and letting her know that he has decided to break off the relationship. But something in Abhi stopped him from taking that hard stand. He felt that Shagun was madly in love with me, she would do whatever I say to keep me happy and with her, so innocent, why to lose her? Why not have her as an option in life so that when I feel like having some fun or support in life, I know whom to fall back upon. I just need to do some peppy talks, senti stuff, some tears and she would be back mine, stupid Shagun, always falls for my talks, hehehe and night ended!!!
Next day he met Shagun finally and told her see Shagun, you are not giving me my personal space and getting too much about future stuff and our relationship lacks any newness. I can continue this relationship only at my comfort zone. Shagun had no other option but to tolerate his arrogance, ego and stick to him, as she already has seen him as his partner in future. She needs to adjust and that’s how she can keep a relationship intact. So things went Abhi’s way and he would run after chicks and when he wanted to get cozy , he had her as an option. When Shagun would crib about he taking her for granted, he would cut a sorry figure, apologize for his actions and Shagun would get carried away with his sweetheart’s tears and get back to normal.
But somewhere, something had to stop or come to an end. Finally, with rumors about Abhi hooking up with other gals, Shagun caught him red handed one day with another gal. That shattered her to the core. She felt as if her life, dreams has ended. She didn’t know what to say or what to react. She went into her shell and just said that” I have nothing else left in my life, no pains, no love, I am dead from heart……………………” She just kept on cursing Abhi of playing with her emotions and making her heartless now.. Relationship ended at that moment, with sorry ending. Abhi moving ahead, looking for options, while Shagun was left to herself and restricted her to a shell, where they was no space for any desires, emotions or desire to live/love…………………………….
Snapshot of the story : Casual close friendship of a guy and gal , changes into a relationship when guy out of the sudden feel he loves the gal. Gal doesn’t agree but senti, emotional talks of the guy make her accept and they start a relationship. Everything goes fine, love, care, emotions, over all a honeymoon period for both of them. With time, casualness creeps in, coz both the guy and gal didn’t start the relationship on mutual note and nowhere had any feelings for each other. It was a desire of the guy to have the gal as gf and it was comfort zone with the guy, which made gal enter into the relationship. Fights, possessiveness, conflicting viewpoints ( as they never talked about views before) brings distance between their relationship. Gal decides to go over the way and cross her limits to bring guy more closer. There is a feeling in gal that she can’t let the guy go away or be angry with her, so she needs to do what it takes to keep him happy. Gal thinks that by accepting all wishes of the guy, she would be able to get guy more closer. But the guy takes it in wrong way and takes the gal for granted. Since the relationship never started on the basis of feeling and more of attraction and comfort zone, at some stage things would fade with time, unless someone decided to revives it. Gal tried to make the relationship, more spicy, adding new dimension, but guys always want newness in relationship, lack of which make them swing at times. Finally, guy decide to move out and look for new options as gf who would add newness to his life, whereas the gal waited for his lover to realize her true love and be back. Guy realized the importance of gal, but in negative sense, where he knew gal can’t go anywhere leaving him, so take advantage of that and let her be an option in life by making her senti all the time, Gal had seen the guy as the future partner and had no option but to adjust and compromise with him. But lies can’t be hidden longer in a relationship as the actions of the partner and behavior says the whole story sooner or later. The relationship ends on a sorry note……………….
Questions raised: Is the gal wrong in showering her love and affection to the guy and crossing her limits to get her love back? Doesn’t love say value the happiness of ur partner, then why did Shagun get such a treatment when she adjusted and did so much for Abhi ? Is this the common mentality of the guys that they always need some spice going on in relationship? Is it wrong to talk about future and marriage, when you not at marriageable age in relationship? Is Shagun right in just putting on the blame on Abhi?
Does this quote hold true always “The 'insecurity' of losing your 'friend' makes you fall in 'love' with them and the 'insecurity' of losing your 'love' makes you lose the 'friend' in them”??
Questions are many, unspoken words, suppressed desires………………………………….Is this how today’s relationship goes? Then what exactly is the way to START a relationship and make sure it lasts forever?
Answers to above in the last post of this series, time for another example from Corporate IT world, in next post…………………………………
P.S—Talking about movie KKHH, talking about company of guy friends, talking about college life are just examples and no where the relationship of such sorts restricted to just college life.
P.P.S.-It is not my story by any means, but experiences I had after interacting with people in past.
P.P.P.S—I could have directly mentioned about how to go about things and what exactly things are done wrong, but I chose to highlight that through a story so as to highlight how exactly things shape up in any relationship.
At the same time, Shagun found solace in constantly trying to call him, reading his mails, sms, recollecting the golden time they spent, reflecting how she changed her priorities to make him happy and silent tears became her asset of life. She didn’t even have her past friends company, as she gave all her time to him and neglected and ignored other friends, which left her alone now, with no support of bf too. His efforts of talking with Abhi always went futile, as he never showed interest nor afforded any time out for her. She just kept on asking the common friends at times about him and his actions. Shagun started sending him all depressing messages, how much lonely she feels in life and how badly she wants him in her life. Abhi was going crazy with no “stylish” gal falling for his trap and Shagun’s actions making him more irritated. He thought of directly speaking with Shagun and letting her know that he has decided to break off the relationship. But something in Abhi stopped him from taking that hard stand. He felt that Shagun was madly in love with me, she would do whatever I say to keep me happy and with her, so innocent, why to lose her? Why not have her as an option in life so that when I feel like having some fun or support in life, I know whom to fall back upon. I just need to do some peppy talks, senti stuff, some tears and she would be back mine, stupid Shagun, always falls for my talks, hehehe and night ended!!!
Next day he met Shagun finally and told her see Shagun, you are not giving me my personal space and getting too much about future stuff and our relationship lacks any newness. I can continue this relationship only at my comfort zone. Shagun had no other option but to tolerate his arrogance, ego and stick to him, as she already has seen him as his partner in future. She needs to adjust and that’s how she can keep a relationship intact. So things went Abhi’s way and he would run after chicks and when he wanted to get cozy , he had her as an option. When Shagun would crib about he taking her for granted, he would cut a sorry figure, apologize for his actions and Shagun would get carried away with his sweetheart’s tears and get back to normal.
But somewhere, something had to stop or come to an end. Finally, with rumors about Abhi hooking up with other gals, Shagun caught him red handed one day with another gal. That shattered her to the core. She felt as if her life, dreams has ended. She didn’t know what to say or what to react. She went into her shell and just said that” I have nothing else left in my life, no pains, no love, I am dead from heart……………………” She just kept on cursing Abhi of playing with her emotions and making her heartless now.. Relationship ended at that moment, with sorry ending. Abhi moving ahead, looking for options, while Shagun was left to herself and restricted her to a shell, where they was no space for any desires, emotions or desire to live/love…………………………….
Snapshot of the story : Casual close friendship of a guy and gal , changes into a relationship when guy out of the sudden feel he loves the gal. Gal doesn’t agree but senti, emotional talks of the guy make her accept and they start a relationship. Everything goes fine, love, care, emotions, over all a honeymoon period for both of them. With time, casualness creeps in, coz both the guy and gal didn’t start the relationship on mutual note and nowhere had any feelings for each other. It was a desire of the guy to have the gal as gf and it was comfort zone with the guy, which made gal enter into the relationship. Fights, possessiveness, conflicting viewpoints ( as they never talked about views before) brings distance between their relationship. Gal decides to go over the way and cross her limits to bring guy more closer. There is a feeling in gal that she can’t let the guy go away or be angry with her, so she needs to do what it takes to keep him happy. Gal thinks that by accepting all wishes of the guy, she would be able to get guy more closer. But the guy takes it in wrong way and takes the gal for granted. Since the relationship never started on the basis of feeling and more of attraction and comfort zone, at some stage things would fade with time, unless someone decided to revives it. Gal tried to make the relationship, more spicy, adding new dimension, but guys always want newness in relationship, lack of which make them swing at times. Finally, guy decide to move out and look for new options as gf who would add newness to his life, whereas the gal waited for his lover to realize her true love and be back. Guy realized the importance of gal, but in negative sense, where he knew gal can’t go anywhere leaving him, so take advantage of that and let her be an option in life by making her senti all the time, Gal had seen the guy as the future partner and had no option but to adjust and compromise with him. But lies can’t be hidden longer in a relationship as the actions of the partner and behavior says the whole story sooner or later. The relationship ends on a sorry note……………….
Questions raised: Is the gal wrong in showering her love and affection to the guy and crossing her limits to get her love back? Doesn’t love say value the happiness of ur partner, then why did Shagun get such a treatment when she adjusted and did so much for Abhi ? Is this the common mentality of the guys that they always need some spice going on in relationship? Is it wrong to talk about future and marriage, when you not at marriageable age in relationship? Is Shagun right in just putting on the blame on Abhi?
Does this quote hold true always “The 'insecurity' of losing your 'friend' makes you fall in 'love' with them and the 'insecurity' of losing your 'love' makes you lose the 'friend' in them”??
Questions are many, unspoken words, suppressed desires………………………………….Is this how today’s relationship goes? Then what exactly is the way to START a relationship and make sure it lasts forever?
Answers to above in the last post of this series, time for another example from Corporate IT world, in next post…………………………………
P.S—Talking about movie KKHH, talking about company of guy friends, talking about college life are just examples and no where the relationship of such sorts restricted to just college life.
P.P.S.-It is not my story by any means, but experiences I had after interacting with people in past.
P.P.P.S—I could have directly mentioned about how to go about things and what exactly things are done wrong, but I chose to highlight that through a story so as to highlight how exactly things shape up in any relationship.
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